Well today was really not a good day. We are back to having blood pressure issues, big blood pressure issues. We also had a lot of conversations with doctors today that I wish we never had to have. Conversations about the realistic potential that Madden might not make it. Not something I am ready to believe but something that is very hard to hear regardless of what I believe. The team at the hospital does still think that him surviving is a realistic potential. Good. Today was just really really hard.
Then around 8:30 I called the hospital. The nurse told me they were just about to call me...I said "uh oh" and she said "ya, just let me pass you to Dr. Conradi" - the intensivist on in the unit who just happened to be in our room. Never ever a good thing. Apparently they think Madden has yet another infection...one more complication he does not need. They took cultures and started him on 3 antibiotics to cover everything. He continued to drop his pressures so they had to go up all all support and start more support meds. They increased his norepi and started him on epi again. They also had to resuscitate him with fluid - 70 mls which means he is going to stay puffy. They paralysed him again so that the ventilator would do the work for him so he wasn't wasting energy. The doctor told me that he is very concerned about him and flat out worried. Also not a good thing. Earlier today he told us that another infection for Madden could be lethal.
Today sucks.
Tomorrow is a new day and it needs to be better.
Madden, all I can say is that I am sorry that this is happening to you. I am sorry that this is your life. I promise you I will stand beside you and do my best to help you get better. I love you and I want you home. Keep fighting small prince, you will win this.
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